Hubby's dad apparently had a mild stroke yesterday (Tuesday)... he was found on the floor of his assisted living residence (he also has Alzheimer's), disoriented and unable to walk well. The residence staff really did nothing more than get him up ... they had no idea how long he had been lying there ... and called my mother-in-law (she is almost 90) who got him to the hospital ... where we went to see him after taking my mom for a post-op visit with her orthopedic surgeon. The CT scan was negative and he is staying there for a couple of days while they do more tests. We should know more today as they are doing a MRI on Dad this morning.
I feel so badly for my hubby as he has so much on his plate with helping me with my health issues, helping me with my mom, and now having to deal with this.
As for my mom ... she is being released this week for a board and care home where she will stay for 3 to 4 weeks until the ortho authorizes full weight bearing on the broken leg. Then she can be readmitted to rehab for therapy on that ... but in the meantime, staying there would be considered 'custodial' and that is not covered. Also, she is feeling frustrated because she reallyt has no money to her name ... just a small social security check and a very small pension ... but my gracious hubby has agreed that we will pick up the charges in the meantime.
By the way, the main lessons I have learned from this ... PLAN AHEAD FOR RETIREMENT (something my mom did NOT do ) and if at all possible ... GET LONG-TERM CARE INSURANCE !!!
Mary Ann * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * "The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8 [8/21/08]
Posts: 3937 | Location: Somewhere out there beneath the pale moonlight ... | Registered: January 02, 2003
FutureBackMom, I am sooooo sorry. It definitely sounds as if your "parade" is being rained on.
My husband and I have a relative in a similar situation to that of your mom. It is very frustrating and sad to see older folks reap the consequences of their actions -- or lack thereof -- earlier in life. (And just at the time when we really need money for college tuition, we may need to begin supplementing this relative's income. )
I will be keeping you and your family in my prayers. Know that the Lord is with you and His perfect plan will not be thwarted. Please keep us posted on your father-in-law's condition.
Posts: 2142 | Location: San Antonio, TX | Registered: April 11, 2006
FBM--I feel your pain and heartily agree with your advice. My parents didn't plan either, and my mom had a devastating stroke that required 24 hour care for many years.
The worst part of course is not the finances, or the guilt that we can't do more, the worst part is knowing they are suffering physically and emotionally when they are least able to cope with it.
We have been much more conservative with our spending, as a result of which I do not believe that our kids will ever have the financial concerns for us that my brother and I have had for our parents. But it is very hard on EVERYONE when this kind of thing happens.
Heartfelt thoughts coming your way.
Posts: 692 | Location: California | Registered: January 02, 2003
FBMom,....HUGZZZZZZZZZZ,...and lots of them coming your way!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " Play both sports until the competition convinces you otherwise!! " " ...because baseball is just GOOD PRACTICE FOR LIFE ".
Posts: 2967 | Location: Kansas | Registered: March 18, 2006
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ " Play both sports until the competition convinces you otherwise!! " " ...because baseball is just GOOD PRACTICE FOR LIFE ".
Posts: 2967 | Location: Kansas | Registered: March 18, 2006
FBM, prayers coming your way! My daddy always tells me that God doesn't give us more than we can handle, I'm sure its true but sometimes I wonder... Hope all is well your way.
Posts: 178 | Location: Central Missouri | Registered: December 20, 2005
Things are settling down a bit as father-in-law has returned to his assisted living residence ... as of last Friday afternoon. The doctors basically have no definitive diagnosis for the incident but believe now that he had some kind of a seisure. I understand that the one Alzheimers med he takes can cause this, and some have told me that some Alzheimers' patients also experience seizures as a result of the illness (I have not researched it personally ... just word of mouth from mother-in-law.)
My mom is in a board and care facility now ... nice and big (I looked at two very good ones and this one is huge with 4000 sq feet of living space for the 6 ladies and the owner. Mom is definitely the youngest at 82 but she seems to be coping well. She needs to get doing her exercises on a regular basis as well as her walking but she is definitely walking so much better. I have to contact the VNA about a physical therapist who is supposed to come out once or twice to the b & c ... and also have to arrange transportation for some x-rays and a doctor's appt after Thanksgiving. Plus, I understand the owner does not celebrate Thanksgiving with the ladies ... she is Romanian (a lovely lovely gal about 38 years old ... ) ... and altho we want to have dinner here at our house, getting Mom here might pose a problem because she can't yet get into and out of a car. That is our next task ... but at least it has more pleasant overtones.
The owner of the b & c gave me a break on the rate and prorated it as well for the rest of the month. She also is waiving the 30 day notice requirement for when Mom leaves. She is a God-send for me at this time.
Thanks again for checking in .... I know the prayers are working because I am still sane and have not lost my sense of humor. Now if I could only get a good night's sleep without the Lunesta
Mary Ann * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * "The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8 [8/21/08]
Posts: 3937 | Location: Somewhere out there beneath the pale moonlight ... | Registered: January 02, 2003
) and if at all possible ... GET LONG-TERM CARE INSURANCE !!!
)
Sending prayers and best wishes. 
